Whenever eggheads opine about what America does best it’s always democracy, jazz and baseball. That’s just super if the United States wants to own the title of “country most likely to put you to sleep” (that currently belongs to Luxembourg.) No, what this nation does best is barbecue, a saucy little noun that packs an even bigger wallop than the smoked Texas “Holy Trinity” of brisket, sausage and pork ribs sans sauce. It’s a simple word, barbecue, but yet it’s an outdoor party, the food being served and the necessary cooking apparatus all rolled into one. Sure, meat geeks look down on the quick-meal-on-the-gas-powered-Weber as merely “grilling,” but let them sweat over an eight-hour hog-roasting while you polish off the rest of your steak kabobs and a sixer of Old Milwaukee.
Barbecue is too big for semantics anyway; it’s the American way of life. The National Barbecue Association claims the first record of open-pit barbecue comes from 1600 B.C. Ancient Greece, while other researchers say the “sacred fire pit” technique derived from the indigenous Taino Nation of the Caribbean and some say it comes out of a French Haitian tradition. Figure it out on your own time, professor. All that matters in this day and age is the mouthwatering cornucopia of varieties in the land of plenty. Damn the technicalities! No matter if its bratwurst on briquettes, salmon in a smoker, or woodchucks over woodchips, it’s all barbecue. And it’s all essential to our collective unalienable right as United States citizens to the pursuit of fat-and-happiness on lazy summer afternoons.
From sea to shining sea, Americans are falling into their hammocks in blissful meat comas. From the vinegar-tinged pulled pork of North Carolina, to the wet – or dry -- ribs of Memphis; from the golden mustardy glaze of South Carolina, to the thick tangy tomato baste of Kansas City; from the beef and cole slaw sandwiches of Arkansas to the grilled lime-and-jalapeno chicken of Arizona…this land was made for you and me.
(Desert Living, July/August 2006)
(Photo by Kevin Russ)
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